FEMOSPHERE

In our current climate, getting the man of your dreams seems like an impossible feat. Challenging, sure. But impossible? Not at all. One of the best ways to find the man of your dreams is to reflect the qualities that you desire.

This mirroring isn’t done to completely change yourself to fit a man’s idea of what kind of woman he wants. In fact, this exercise will better prepare you to pick a man who will actually meet your standards. Mirroring is a way to better your own development while simultaneously setting yourself up for a happy relationship down the road.

Relationships are Reciprocal

Relationships shouldn’t be transactional, but they are reciprocal. Relationships are built on giving and receiving and receiving and giving. This is one of the reasons that I have an issue with some of the “sprinkle-sprinkle” gold-digger-lite content that is becoming more popular.

You should not be just taking and he should not be just giving. You should not be just giving and he be just taking. This would make for a very unhealthy and unstable relationship.

If your relationship goals are to be lavished with money, praise, and material possessions without giving anything in return, your relationship will be very unfulfilling.

Reflecting Positive Traits

Being reciprocal can be described as reflecting the traits that you desire in a man. Most women know what kind of men they don’t want, but do you know what kind of man you do want? If not, start there.

Once you have a list of qualities that you desire in a man, you can begin cultivating those same qualities in yourself. Listed below are common desirable traits in men and how women can reflect those traits.

• Generosity. Women seek a man who is generous with his money, possessions, compliments, and love. You can practice being generous to others and showing gratitude. This also requires being comfortable with receiving.
• Good financial position. Many women desire a man with money or a man who can provide (those are two separate things). A woman does not need to be financially successful but she can reflect this quality by managing her own finances wisely.
• Intelligence. A woman can reflect intelligence by being willing to listen to your man talk about subjects that might be uninteresting to you. You can cultivate your own intellect by writing, reading, or pursuing intellectually stimulating hobbies.
• Ambitious. A woman can cultivate ambition by setting high goals and standards for herself. She can also reflect ambition by being supportive of new business or career ventures (within reason).
• Chivalrous. A woman can reflect chivalry by being accepting and gracious when a man shows chivalry towards you.
• Discipline. A woman can cultivate discipline by keeping commitments and following through on projects. This means even listening to yourself if you tell yourself you will or won’t do something.

Why Should You Reflect Positive Traits?

There are several reasons why you should possess and reflect the positive traits you’d like in a partner.

Firstly, having these traits will allow for you to be more aware of the same traits in others. If you’re intentionally focusing on cultivating these qualities within yourself you will become more attuned to notice the same qualities in others.

Secondly, when you meet the man of your dreams you will be a better match. Studies show that couples are most successful when they have similar values like the ones I listed above. Being similarly aligned in terms of responsibility, generosity, and discipline will make for a better relationship.

Lastly, having the qualities you want to see in your partner will only help them grow in those qualities. We become like the person we spend the most time with. You don’t want to get the man of your dreams then lose him because he (subconsciously) begins to reflect any poor behavior or habits that you may have.

In conclusion, being mindful of the qualities you desire in a husband then cultivating those own qualities in yourself can be beneficial for development and relationships. This is beneficial because it allows you to become more mindful of your own standards and better able to judge if someone meets those standards. Additionally, this will contribute to the success of a relationship through aligned values and reciprocal behavior.